You don't exactly feel like a....

REAL WOMAN WHEN:
1. you run into the toilet becos, obviously your pee threshold has reached it's maximum capacity and you pull down everything at one go, relieved and suddenly realised, hey where's that sanitary pad that's supposed to be stuck on your underwear???
The next thing you know, darn, it's in the toilet bowl! Don't ask me how it got there and how i retrieved it out. Thank God I'm at home.

REAL GOODIE GOODIE PARENT WHEN:
1. Your mom complained that your son had caused his cousin to cry because he had won a fight and got his toy tightly clenched in his fist and whoever goes near gets hit by the coveted toy by your son. That cousin that lost is 4 years his senior. I did that lecture style mandatory exercise with my son, got him to apologised to his cousin and let him off with a warning. But darn! I am glowing and beaming with pride! MY SON WON HIS FIRST FIGHT AND MADE A BIGGER BOY CRY! WOOT! HE'S A CHAMPION!

On both occassions, I laughed till my sides ached. The first loudly and the second, secretly.