感动

My form class is graduating this April. They have finished the race and have all completed the exams and I am proud to say that I have 100% passing rate for my class. Towards my class, I have this strange attachment and love. It's like suddenly I have 35 children that I would learn to know them by their characteristics, personalities, background and strangely, I have over time, developed"maternal" instincts towards all of them.

The class had a mini farewell chalet last week. We played crazy card games, catch up on what they did after the exams. We exchanged gossips on what's happening to who and what and we laughed and painted the town red. They even organized games and each of us even have eccentric surprise gifts that may consist things like: Shampoo, pillows, mouth washes etc....

After dinner, suddenly they were organised and sitting in a circle and then they said they would like to say something to me and they brought me a BIG poster they made that reads, Becky's babies and it was a montage of their photos and they included one of Maoster and me. They bought me a plush bunny (as they mock at me after finding out that my Aung calls me bun bun) and they made a book with their writings of best wishes and thanks. They got me an expensive cake (to them, I think they put in all their every $$$ on it ). I told them I would not cry but how not to when all their eyes were red and they were waiting for me to say a few words to them. It was that formal. It was that weird. It was intense. It was so not them. It was a moment whereby I am lost for words and all I could do was all smoked up and I teared. Suddenly, Corissa a girl that I had so much trouble with ( all the police case and home visits and endless of chatting wtih her over 2 years) started tearing like no one's business and one by one they all teared as if I am on my death bed. The boys started tearing and that was the last straw. We just all laughed at our silly-ness and cried like babies at the same time. I am touched because they know how much I love them and they know that to me, they are like my babies. It was emotions that intense that even now as I typed a week later, I could feel waves of emotions coming to me.

I thank God that I am in my job. I am in a position to love and in a position to give. I am in a position whereby I could touched lives and give hope. I am also thankful that I could receive that abundance love and support. I am pleasantly surprised how when I genuinely open myself to my students and extend my support and love to them, they would somehow(not all the time though) feel it and appreciate it.

Late at night as I was talking to my boys (that's how I call them), they were sharing with me some silly things that ended up into sharing about their families and ended up with my darling Clement tearing as his parents are now talking about getting a divorce. Suddenly I realised at 19, they are still pretty much wanting to be loved. At that age, they seemed like a young adult but yet they are so lost and so afraid. They are afraid about the future ( not all will get into Poly) and probably will end up working soon or NS. They have alot of unknowns, I realised no matter how much I want to be part of their future, I can't. They need someone bigger, someone better, someone capable, more consistent. They all need God.

I think in the days to come, we will all forget this moment. This moment whereby we feel touched, appreciated and loved. This moment whereby we hope this was forever, this moment whereby we want to stay in touch and brave the storm together - alas we all know that as the wheels of time turns all of us will be walking our own paths. I pray that one day, I will look back and remember this moment fondly. My Class IE0904I.

My silly boys ( not all in though) and their silly pose!