This is NOT the Cinderella story although what I was hoping for was exactly a Cinderella's ending - A HAPPY EVER AFTER.
Aung and I have been married for coming 11 years and we dated for 7 and that make us in today's fast paced and ever changing environment a pretty darn long time. I cannot remember honestly how was life before him, nor am I ever thinking how will my life be in the future with him. In fact, I do not think very much about him. As a person, as a partner, as a lover, as a dad, as a friend. Honestly, I stopped "thinking". It is pretty much like, you stopped tracking how much water you drink per day or how many times did you pee in a day. You know you do it and you know the importance of it but you just do not put your mind into something so "basic".
Then, there are the offsprings. And other people's offsprings ( almost 120 of them this Semester). Then there is the "new role" at work that is on my mind. I mean there are 101 things going on my mind and yet there is nothing on my mind (it is very complex, I tell you this grey matter of mine). In the end, I realized, between my Aung and I we stopped. In the middle of all this building a home, raising children and hope, the "exchanges" stopped, the "conversations" stopped. Without us knowing, the fizz in the coke is gone!
I didn't know it until Clarks told me so.
Aung bought a pair of shoes 2 weeks ago. It was a pair of tracking shoes he bought (tracking????) and after that, he placed it in the study room. On Monday, we went to J8 to get dinner and told him that his work shoes are a wreck and we should pop in to buy a pair of shoes if we have time. So we went to Hush puppies and he got a pair of shoes and we walked around and I asked him if he would want to get another pair of casual shoes and stuff like that and we went back home. When we reached home, Aung's mom exclaimed, " Why did we get another pair of shoes when Aung just bought a pair of new shoes?" She had assumed, I know about the shoes.
The shoes? What shoes? Aung took them out from the study room and showed me his "tracking" shoes and said, " they are not my usual shoes. I was thinking about them. They were on sale. I didn't know what to do with them and he laughed." I wasn't laughing.
Something stirred in me that night. I couldn't quite sleep. No, I wasn't upset that Aung had bought a "senseless" pair of shoes. What shocked me was that, he didn't talk to me about buying the pair of shoes, He didn't tell me that he was looking at the shoes when he was thinking about them. He didn't even mentioned it when we were looking at shoes the very evening. I was honestly upset that we stopped "living" together.
Was it his fault? Not really. Perhaps the "small things" in life are not worth mentioning anymore because we have BIGGER things ( like when is the date of the excursion for the boys that we better remember). We used to have sms exchanges throughout the day sharing about stupid things and exciting things but because of work and stuff ( sometimes we do not reply or it seems mundane), we stopped totally.
Was it my fault? Perhaps. I am always so drowned in my world or busy playing with my friends that I do not stop and listen or even communicate. When we discuss things, the "boss" in me will normally go straight to the solution or convey my decision that there is no need for discussion etc.
I told Aung how I felt and what I feel. Guess it is a good start. I am thankful and grateful that Aung is always willing to embark on the "better" of us with positivity and tenderness. He did not brush it off and say , " Come on woman, it was just a pair of shoes! Just get on with LIFE! There is absolutely nothing wrong with us?" Instead, he texted me that I am such a big part of my life and the most interesting bun around.
This is really something to reflect upon as we are celebrating our 11th wedding anniversary at the corner of this month. Coke is not coke without fizz.
That's what Clarks told me. Thank God for that stupid pair of tracking shoes - They definitely put back some stuff on track!
Aung and I have been married for coming 11 years and we dated for 7 and that make us in today's fast paced and ever changing environment a pretty darn long time. I cannot remember honestly how was life before him, nor am I ever thinking how will my life be in the future with him. In fact, I do not think very much about him. As a person, as a partner, as a lover, as a dad, as a friend. Honestly, I stopped "thinking". It is pretty much like, you stopped tracking how much water you drink per day or how many times did you pee in a day. You know you do it and you know the importance of it but you just do not put your mind into something so "basic".
Then, there are the offsprings. And other people's offsprings ( almost 120 of them this Semester). Then there is the "new role" at work that is on my mind. I mean there are 101 things going on my mind and yet there is nothing on my mind (it is very complex, I tell you this grey matter of mine). In the end, I realized, between my Aung and I we stopped. In the middle of all this building a home, raising children and hope, the "exchanges" stopped, the "conversations" stopped. Without us knowing, the fizz in the coke is gone!
I didn't know it until Clarks told me so.
Aung bought a pair of shoes 2 weeks ago. It was a pair of tracking shoes he bought (tracking????) and after that, he placed it in the study room. On Monday, we went to J8 to get dinner and told him that his work shoes are a wreck and we should pop in to buy a pair of shoes if we have time. So we went to Hush puppies and he got a pair of shoes and we walked around and I asked him if he would want to get another pair of casual shoes and stuff like that and we went back home. When we reached home, Aung's mom exclaimed, " Why did we get another pair of shoes when Aung just bought a pair of new shoes?" She had assumed, I know about the shoes.
The shoes? What shoes? Aung took them out from the study room and showed me his "tracking" shoes and said, " they are not my usual shoes. I was thinking about them. They were on sale. I didn't know what to do with them and he laughed." I wasn't laughing.
Something stirred in me that night. I couldn't quite sleep. No, I wasn't upset that Aung had bought a "senseless" pair of shoes. What shocked me was that, he didn't talk to me about buying the pair of shoes, He didn't tell me that he was looking at the shoes when he was thinking about them. He didn't even mentioned it when we were looking at shoes the very evening. I was honestly upset that we stopped "living" together.
Was it his fault? Not really. Perhaps the "small things" in life are not worth mentioning anymore because we have BIGGER things ( like when is the date of the excursion for the boys that we better remember). We used to have sms exchanges throughout the day sharing about stupid things and exciting things but because of work and stuff ( sometimes we do not reply or it seems mundane), we stopped totally.
Was it my fault? Perhaps. I am always so drowned in my world or busy playing with my friends that I do not stop and listen or even communicate. When we discuss things, the "boss" in me will normally go straight to the solution or convey my decision that there is no need for discussion etc.
I told Aung how I felt and what I feel. Guess it is a good start. I am thankful and grateful that Aung is always willing to embark on the "better" of us with positivity and tenderness. He did not brush it off and say , " Come on woman, it was just a pair of shoes! Just get on with LIFE! There is absolutely nothing wrong with us?" Instead, he texted me that I am such a big part of my life and the most interesting bun around.
This is really something to reflect upon as we are celebrating our 11th wedding anniversary at the corner of this month. Coke is not coke without fizz.
That's what Clarks told me. Thank God for that stupid pair of tracking shoes - They definitely put back some stuff on track!
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